By Stephanie Doliveira
I recently visited Disney World, the “most magical place on Earth,” with my fourteen-year-old son, Carter. Spinning rides are no longer my forte, so I took advantage of time on a bench to reflect on the gift this trip was providing me with my youngest child who is growing up way too fast. Saying “yes” to this adventure meant saying “no” to many other things – but it was so worth it.
If you’re like me, the pressures of balancing personal and work commitments can feel like a no-win proposition. Because the plate is overflowing, there are times when the stress of it all causes me to say yes to requests out of obligation and no to those I judge to be “self-indulgent.”
When this happens, I try to reset by turning to intentionality and mindfulness to help steer my decisions back on track. If you crave being in control of your life, actively and intentionally embracing new opportunities and challenges, try this simple approach to experience the magic of “yes!”
Reflection
To truly gain control of your time, it’s essential to clarify what’s most important to you—personally and professionally. Achieving this clarity starts with an in-depth understanding of your values, followed by outlining your goals. Without this foundational clarity, it’s easy to say “yes” or “no” based on fleeting emotions rather than making choices that genuinely align with the bigger picture of your life. By identifying what matters most, you can make decisions that actively support your growth and overall well-being.
Prioritize Your Time Decisions
When you’re clear on your values and goals, it becomes significantly easier to prioritize how you spend your time. Ask reflective questions such as: What is most important to me right now? How does this opportunity serve my bigger goals?
This practice of reflecting on what’s most important to help prioritize time applies at an organizational level also. At Sheetz, we are committed to caring for people and enhancing the experiences they have in their daily lives. That’s why we make it a habit to ask before making important business decisions: How does this benefit our people — our employees, customers, and communities? By being clear about what we stand for and where we’re headed, it becomes significantly easier to prioritize choices that resonate with our core values and support our broader vision.
The Magic of Yes (and No)
Saying yes means that you’re open to moving past your comfort zone and embracing a new challenge. By saying yes, you naturally adopt a growth mindset, leading with curiosity, and opening your life to more joy. But making room to say yes may feel impossible, especially if you feel like there’s not enough time in the day. If you’re a person who often says no to opportunities, personal or professional, delve a little deeper to see if you can determine why you tend to decline. Is fear holding you back? Are you fronting the load of personal or professional responsibilities? What would you need to be able to say yes to the things that are most important to you? The magic of yes is liberating because it encourages us to conquer our doubts, fears, and insecurities. To appreciate the power of yes, commit to new opportunities on a regular cadence.
There are also times that we have over committed, where the fear of missing out led us to a series of “yes, sign me up!” If you find yourself in this position (for me, it’s often), you may need to get comfortable with saying no. This can be hard, especially when there’s a desire to avoid disappointing someone or missing potential opportunities. When this happens, I’ve found that reframing is helpful: when you confidently say no to commitments that do not serve you, you are simultaneously creating space for opportunities that more closely align with your goals. Saying no is a way to say yes to the most important experiences!
Ask for Support
Having supportive networks, whether friends, family, a life partner, or through work, where you feel comfortable expressing your needs and vulnerabilities is crucial to committing to a “yes.” To make the magical trip to Disney happen, I had to ask co-workers to help with work responsibilities, and my parents to take care of my dog.
I know as a strong and independent woman, it’s often hard for me to ask for help. But the truth is, no one can do all of it by themselves. Here are a few mantras that may be useful: Asking for help is not a weakness, it’s self-awareness and wisdom. Asking for help is an invitation for others to join your mission. Asking for help welcomes those you care about to do the same for you.
I have not mastered these skills, and I still encounter challenges. Despite occasional missteps, usually saying yes to too many things, I am committed to this approach of reflection, prioritization and asking for support. There is no doubt that it has positively influenced my journey toward intentional living. The magic of Disney reminded me that saying yes to priceless time with my family doesn’t detract from my leadership at Sheetz. In fact, I feel more energized to tackle the next important thing, because I took time to fuel my heart and soul with Carter.
Stephanie Doliveira is EVP, People and Culture at Sheetz. She’ll be delivering a keynote, “Owning Your Time: Harnessing the Power of Prioritization,” at the 2025 PA Chamber Women in Business Conference on April 3, 2025, at the Lancaster Marriott in Lancaster, PA.